What Your Potato Chips Say About You

On Fridays when I don’t have any Field Notes to post, I’ve started to post these odd personality assessments based on food. I don’t understand it, but you people seem to love it.

What Your Potato Chips Say About You
A completely inaccurate analysis

Regular
At first glance, you seem run of the mill. There is nothing that stands out about you, and you’re not that memorable. However, you know your strengths and weaknesses and how to play them to your advantage. You know that standing alone won’t get you noticed, so you work hard to develop your skills and interests that will give you that extra pizazz.  If you were to do any public speaking, for example, you know that just talking in front of a crowd wouldn’t suffice. You would create a multimedia Powerpoint presentation that would capture your audience, but not take away from your message. To your core, you are simple and straightforward, but you know how to captivate people and keep them coming back to you.

Salt & Vinegar
You’re the friend that people really love, but only in small doses. You have a quick, sharp sense of humour that shocks people, but you still manage to win them over. You get invited to places and seem to know everyone. You’re around, but it’s not necessarily because people are drawn to you. If you were a comic book character, you would be Reggie Mantle. You have friends, you’ve been on dates with Veronicas, but it’s not because you’re especially likeable. You just manage to weasel your way into everything. You would thrive as a salesman or a lawyer, with your quick wit and persuasive personality.

Sour Cream & Onion
You’re more regular than Regular chip guy.  You’re the girl/guy next door. You’re not overpowering, but you leave a lasting impression. If you asked someone out on a date, they would think you’re just being friendly. You think you’re doomed to be in the friend zone forever. Initially, they’ll end up going for more of a “bad boy/girl”, but don’t worry. Once s/he realizes you were what s/he wanted the whole time, you’ll have her/him captivated.  The beauty of someone like you is that you’re what everyone is looking for, they just don’t know it yet. Be patient.

Ketchup
You’re really polite, but can be a bit on the reserved side. You get along with everyone and tend to be a bit of a people pleaser. In theory, your personality sounds great. Who doesn’t love polite people? In practice though, something is just a little off. Why are you smiling so much? Is everyone really your “buddy”? How come you never get angry? Are you actually normal, or are you a few monkeys short of a barrel? No one will really understand.

Dill Pickle
You are really weird. If one of your close friends were to describe you, they would say that you are quirky. Your unique personality draws people to you. You write songs about inanimate objects. You would consider having a dreadlock. Not a full head of dreadlocks. Just one. You were that student in college that opted to perform an interpretive dance in place of a serious presentation, yet still managed to pull off an A. You are weird, but it’s endearing. No one quite remembers how they got to be your friend, but they are all thankful they did.

All Dressed
No one understands you because you’re trying to do too much at once. Like the bros at the club drinking cider, popping collars and wearing an entire bottle of cologne, you just don’t make sense. You have a strong personality that only appeals to a few people. Those on the outside of your friend group don’t get why they would ever gravitate to someone who talks in abrevs and eats at Schlotzsky’s. You and your bros bust out crappy break dance moves at the club, and chest bump each other when you catch the ladies looking. Bro, that look on that chick’s face? That’s horror.

What’s your favourite flavour?

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26 thoughts on “What Your Potato Chips Say About You

  1. My guess is I’m a regular.

    I sit in the background listening, offering comments only on things I am familiar with. A wall flower (boring) who does not call attention to himself.

    • There is an advantage to being low key because no one pays you any attention. Everyone else is trying to get their thoughts into the conversation, they forget you are there listening and learning. Then when you say something really bright, they are surprised that you are so astute.
      More people should try it, they might learn something!

      Walk daily with God at your side!

      Ed

  2. I’m what everyone is looking for, they just don’t know it yet. I’ll totally claim that analysis. :D

    I love the last two sentences on the All Dressed one!

    What about non-potato-based chips? – cheese puffs of various sorts, corn chips, and tortilla chips? Or the pretzel chip things? Oh, and those fruit chips. Not the fruit-flavored chips, but chips made by baking slices of fruit?

  3. Though I’m not sure you assessed my personality, I’m a fan of the plain chips.

    However, potato chips, in general, are not my favorite. I like tortilla chips. What does that say about my personality?

  4. I prefer the barbeque potato chips. Since those are not on your list, does that mean I don’t have a personality?

    My next favorite are the cheddar (or cheddar and sour cream) potato chips. I don’t even have a back-up personality.

  5. i am a standard person with standard potato chip needs. thank you for putting me in a box… A BOX THAT IS REALLY A SPACESHIP TO URANUS. Thank you, i love space.

  6. I have a love/hate relationship with Salt and Vinegar chips. I love them and will inhale a whole bag unless stopped. And then I swear that I’ll never eat them again because they burn my tongue. Perhaps I should see a counsellor over this.

    What would you say about Chicken Curry chips? (I had them in India)…

    Clever post, BTW!

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