Friday Field Notes: Science Talk

Every week I encounter anywhere between 20 and 100+ kids. They say some ridiculous things. I write them down as accurately and timely as possible, then compile the best lines into these weekly Friday Field Notes.

Enjoy. I certainly do.

I was with the same group of kids from last Thursday through until the following Wednesday. They were ridiculous. They were noisy, nutty and all over the place, but I had SO much fun with them. There is a special place in my heart for these monkeys. They were priceless. I was so busy and having so much fun that I forgot to write down a lot of what they said. But here are a few.

Me: Ok, you guys hit about 12:15 and you all go nuts. Why do you think that is? We have great mornings, but our afternoons are tough.
B: Well. It’s after break and we’ve all eaten our food and then all of a sudden we all get a bunch of energy all at once because we’ve digested our food.
L: What?
B: That’s SCIENCE TALK.
L: You’re weird.
S: Look, the teacher is laughing!
(All the kids look at me laughing, which makes me laugh harder)
Me: Well that was funny.

The kids are using the letters from the word “properties” to make new words.

R: You can make poop!
L: No you can’t! There is only one ‘o’.
R: YEAH! POOP! P-O-P!
A: That’s POP.
R: No, it’s POOP.
M: No it’s not! (goes to get a dictionary)
Me: What’s going on guys?
R: You can spell POOP with this word.
Me: No you can’t.
R: YES. My mom said poop is spelled P-O-P.
L: TWO ‘O’s. You need TWO.
M: It’s not in the dictionary.
Me: R, TRUST ME, poop is spelled P-O-O-P. End of discussion.

Me: So what do you think an angle that is straight called? Make an educated guess.
K: A straight angle?
Me: Yeah! A straight angle!
L: YOU’RE A STRAIGHT ANGLE.
Me: (look at L)
L: Sorry.

Grade 1

Me: Can you tell me what the food groups are?
R: Vegetables!
Me: Yes, fruits and vegetables. What else?
L: Shrimp?
Me: Well, shrimp is IN one of the food groups. What is that one called?
J: Bleach.
Me: Excuse me?
J: Bleach.
Me: Uh. No. You should neeeever eat bleach.

J: My lizard’s name is RANDALL.

During math, wrapping a measuring tape around his lizard’s belly:

J (whispering): Don’t worry Randall, this won’t hurt.

Kindergarten duty (hah duty)

Kid: Are you a girl?
Me: Yes.

Girl: Are you a kid?
Me: No, I’m a teacher.

WHO IS YOUR NAME?

Obviously Caucasian girl: Guess what?
Me: What?
OCG: I’m from Korea!
Me: Oh wow.
Obviously Korean Girl: No. She’s not. I’m from Korea.

Have a good weekend.
That’s SCIENCE talk.

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5 thoughts on “Friday Field Notes: Science Talk

  1. I’m not saying I’ve done this, but if you look up poop on merriam-webster.com, it’s in that dictionary. I also have it on good authority that if you use their pronunciation option, the man who says it for you makes it almost sound respectable and serious, which makes it all the funnier. I’m not saying I’VE done this…but I know someone who has.

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